Umbrellas - A Love Hate Relationship / by Simmon Li

So, today it was raining. "Score!" I say to myself, "I knew I bought an umbrella for something!" Now, to be fair, I've used the umbrella on a few occasions already, it has served me well; but today, the thing was utterly useless. It made me second guess why I bought it in the first place. Like a fish flopping out of water, my umbrella flopped all over in the wind. It turned inside out, and I ended up getting soaked anyway. I was not impressed, and wracked my brain as to how I could solve this problem. Now, I've seen those crazy small umbrellas that are see through, so you can just schlep it over yourself. (Also, I am very impressed my Firefox knows what schlep is.)  I imagine that such an umbrella has its shortcomings as well (I just imagine the umbrella owning my face when a gust of wind kicks up), but I really wanted one of those ones today. Anyway, I love my umbrella when it isn't too windy. When it's too windy, I may as well just get soaked anyway. Then there's the medium wind situation, where my umbrella holds up, but feels so shoddy that I have to cradle it like some baby. At that point, I just look like an idiot that's never used an umbrella before. C'est la vie.